I really believe this: all the opportunities that we seek, if we're able to clarify them, if we're able to name them, one of our first degree connections will have a connection to someone who will have access to that opportunity or who can get us closer to that opportunity. - Tina Sula

Tina Sula, is a philanthropic advisor and fundraiser, professor, and expert in networking. I recently sat down with her to talk about the importance of knowing what you want, how to make authentic connections, and being clear about your value alignment.

The Importance Of Knowing What You Want

It’s so easy to rush into networking without really taking the time to understand completely what it is that we want, and in turn what we want from others.

“There is no learning without reflection, because we’re all so busy doing”

“If you want to get a new job, you don't go on LinkedIn, you don't update your resume or any of that stuff. You don't even call your friends. You first, have that conversation with yourself and say, you know, what is it that I really want? That's self-leadership.”

➡ Then you get to networking.

** If you’re not sure what you want then why not take a look at this blog post ‘Behind the Curtain’ and discover what might be preventing you from discovering that for yourself **

“We as humans want to know your motivation. We want to know if we should align with you. Does your purpose align with my purpose? Because if it aligns, I'll go to the moon and back for you to support you. But if we're not aligned, or if your values don't align with mine, I probably wouldn't make as much of an effort.”

“We need a friend, coach, mentor or a teacher, for the things that are so dear to us. But we can't articulate them all by ourselves. I mean, that's the whole point of coaching - having somebody who can take you on that journey so that you can articulate what's most important to you.”

✨ Knowing what you want, and being able to articulate it, along with your why, is a vital step in achieving your goals, and a must when it comes to networking. ✨

Your Personal Branding

So let’s imagine that you know what you want, and you know your why, but you are in reality making a big pivot. Let’s say you're at a crossroads and you don't want to do what you did previously. How do you help people understand the shift?

”You have to start introducing yourself or showing up in a way that very much aligns with the new direction that you want to follow. Because we're humans, we seek patterns. So if Tina's the teacher, then we will always think of Tina as a teacher. And if Tina wants to pivot, and become an astronaut, then it's going to take a while for us to think of Tina as an astronaut, because that's the new direction that she has chosen. People are not going to do that work for you.”

“I talked in a recent webinar about my Ford Explorer, but I didn't always drive a Ford Explorer. But once I started driving a Ford Explorer, I notice immediately all the other Ford Explorers. So the same thing goes with personal branding.”

If all of a sudden, Tina is the person who talks about networking, then any time you hear of someone searching for a networking person, you’re going to introduce them to Tina. It’s your job to clarify to yourself, and the world, what you want to do with your life, all aspects of your life so that when you're driving on the road, you can find the Ford Explorer that is Tina!

Structure Your Networking

We all have relationships that we want to be cultivating, but with our busy lives it can be hard to stay on top of these - when I asked Tina about this, she shared her 4 step networking mindset and process with me:

1. What are you trying to achieve? - ”What are you really trying to accomplish here? Forget the how. Let's start with where - where are you trying to go? It's like I always tell my students - everyone can have a GPS, right? Networking is your GPS. The problem is if you don't have an end destination - you are just going to redirect and redirect and redirect.”

2. Who can help you? - “Who do you want to start with, because networking is all about people.”

3. Make the ask - Reach out to your connections. make it clear what you do, why you do it, and then how you do it - don’t leave people to guess.

4. Follow Up - “Follow up and follow through with the sharing of gratitude”.

Example:

“I really want to transition from being a recruiter to being a software engineer or whatever, or a data engineer. And I see that you've made this a similar transition. You know, any chance you can give me 15 minutes of your time?”

It’s that simple.

Value Alignment

“My biggest takeaway from my almost 20 months in California was the importance of value alignment”

“There is no point in accepting a job because you need a job if you're going to end up being miserable in that job. So think very hard about it. Find out what are the values of the company and of the people that work at that company and really determine if their values and their mission statement or purpose align with who you are.”

In terms of networking:

“As you're meeting people, the people you want in your network are the people who are going to be value aligned to you, because when you're value-aligned, it's a real relationship. When you're aligned with somebody simply because they're the CEO or the CMO, it's not a real relationship - you're not going to value them if they didn't have that position.

People give opportunities to people who their values align with and that's where we talked about, you know, being sincere and being authentic because people can smell fake. I think in today's world people crave real. So it's okay to be real because when you're being real, you're also assessing that value alignment.

You can listen to the full podcast episode here, and if you’d like to know more about Tina Sula’s course ‘How to Network: Leading Yourself to Lead Others’ you can find it here: How to Network: Leading Yourself to Lead Others